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Is she interested or not?

#1
Hi,

So I am currently dating 3 girls casually, but there is a girl (lets call her Hannah) I hung out with a few times from my class last semester who I have a huge crush on. So last semester we went for lunch and had coffee a few times and we get along incredibly well; whenever we talk it's like time just flies by. But then after a few times, she kept saying refusing to go lunch even though we'd been in the library the entire day together, to which her friend would make things a bit awkward by saying she should have lunch with me. After that, I just stopped trying and started going out with other girls and sometimes casually talking to Hannah through IM's and in class (we always sat next to each other).

So a few weeks ago, the new semester started and I don't have any classes with her now. 2 weeks ago we all decided to go out with our group of friends and she kept passing up advances from all the other guys and she wanted to be the only one in my car with me when we drove to the bar. Needless to say, we started making out at the bar. But I did something stupid; I hinted that I wanted to go back to her place ( since she lives a few streets from the bar.) and i got shot down. I didn't text her till 3 days afterwards and it wasn't awkward at all, but then a mutual friend of ours who is still in her class asked me if i was going to her houseparty the next day? I wasn't invited so obviously I said no. From that point I kept thinking of reasons why I wasn't invited. then he sent me a text an hour before the party saying he was going at 9 and that she asked him if I was coming. I went to the party and everything was fine between us, and we even gave each other a few glances and there was an intimate moment, but nothing happened. So we went to a bar and she just started ignoring me and kept going to that mutual friend of ours. Then I went home at 4 am. She sent me a text at 5 am (my battery was dead so I only got the text when I started charging it) saying: Text me when you're home so i can go to sleep, bitch.

And now she's always hanging out with that guy and everything and I just feel awkward now. I don't know what to do? I never run after a girl, I mean I'm dating 3 girls (she doesn't know about them) and the only girl I want to be with is her. Plus everyone knows there's something between us so maybe she's scared? i don't know anymore :?

- Benny

Re: Is she interested or not?

#2
Please repost this new post as a reply to the string of posts you've already begun on this site here: viewtopic.php?f=1&t=175948&p=190412#p190412. It's much easier to better advice when your history is in one place. I'll answer your new questions when you repost them. :)
April Masini is a relationship and etiquette expert and popular media resource —  author of four relationship advice books, the 'Ask April' advice column and the #1 free relationship advice forum where over 27,000 questions have been asked and answered, personally, by April. She has nearly a quarter million active forum members, 620,000 Facebook fans and over 1.4 million Twitter followers.

Re: Is she interested or not?

#3
Ok, so she answered that she couldn't meet up on friday night because she'd made plans with her parents for dinner and that she was going out with her friends afterwards. I was pretty glad she answered at least, even though it was almost 24 hours after I'd sent the initial text.

I didn't text her for 2 days after that and just sent her a text to see how her big test was. I sent her a text today (sunday) to see if she wanted to do anything tomorrow since it's a bank holiday but she's taking hours to respond again even though she read my message.

I am honestly starting to think that i should just cut my losses here.

Re: Is she interested or not?

#4
You need to readjust your expectations! ;) When someone takes hours to respond to your text, it doesn't mean they don't like you. It means they're busy. People with lots going on very often take a full day to respond to a text that isn't urgent. So don't worry the way you have been, if someone is taking hours to respond to a text, it doesn't mean they're not interested in you. In addition, when you ask someone out by text, you're not giving the date a lot of value. Texting is great because it's quick and easy, but it isn't a way to let someone know you really care. If you want to make more of an impression, pick up the phone and call her. When you hear each others' voices and pick up all the nuances (and respond to them) that come through in a live phone call, you can create a lot more intimacy with someone you want to get to know better. 8-) She may think that because you're inviting her to get together via text, because you're not that interested -- which is ironic because you're wondering if she's interested! She may be wondering the same thing.
April Masini is a relationship and etiquette expert and popular media resource —  author of four relationship advice books, the 'Ask April' advice column and the #1 free relationship advice forum where over 27,000 questions have been asked and answered, personally, by April. She has nearly a quarter million active forum members, 620,000 Facebook fans and over 1.4 million Twitter followers.

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